Debt Can Suck the Love From Valentine's Day

           Valentine's Day might suck if you are in debt, but probably not for the reason(s) you are thinking right now.  It's not because you might not be able to afford the deluxe assorted chocolates or a weekend getaway for your Valentine.  It's not even because you and your Valentine might decide to skip the "Hallmark Holiday" altogether so that you can focus on paying off your debt.  The reason that debt will make your Valentine's Day suck is that debt is a huge factor in stress.  At Halcomb Singler I meet with couples every day who are stressed beyond belief about debt and considering bankruptcy.

           Some of the couples I meet with are just stressed out from debt, some are stressed out and blaming each other for the debt (sometimes they are open with the blame and sometimes you can just tell), and sometimes they are going through divorce but want to file bankruptcy prior to finalizing their divorce.  But one thing that they have in common is that debt has negatively effected or sometimes even ended their relationship.  Sometimes I feel more like a marriage counselor than a bankruptcy attorney.

           Think about it.  If you are not living paycheck to pay check and have 9 months of emergency savings in the bank it probably wouldn't really annoy you if your spouse went out and bought 3 dozen long-stemmed roses for Valentine's Day.  In fact, you would probably love it.  However, if your spouse goes out and spends $150.00 on 3 dozen roses and you have been stressing out all day about how you are going to make the house payment this month, you are probably going to get mad and see if he can return the roses to get that money back.  Even a gesture that was meant to show his love can be the start of a fight when finances are tight.  The fact is, that having problems with money just gives couples one more thing to fight about and we all know with the rate of divorce in this county that the last thing married couples need is another reason to fight.

         And when couples are drowning in debt they are wrestling with much bigger decisions than Valentine's Day gifts.  They are forced to make decisions regarding whether to try to sell a house to get out from under the payment, whether a stay at home mom should go back to work to provide income for the family, whether the kids can participate in traveling sports teams, etc.  These are not insignificant decisions and those whom have issues with debt for whatever reason have less financial resources and are therefore required to make tough decisions.

        As the old saying goes, "Money can't buy you happiness, but it does let you pick your problems."  To some extent I do agree with this saying.  Having a lot of debt simply gives couples less options to solve their own problems and the resulting problems put more stress on them and their relationship.

        So on this Valentine's Day I urge all of those who are suffering under the weight of significant debt issues to take the time to focus on the relationship.  Focus on communication aimed at solutions instead of placing blame and keep in mind that home made presents are often much better than anything that can be bought at a store.  Happy Valentine's Day All!

Halcomb Singler, LLP, is a debt relief agency.  It helps people file for bankruptcy under the bankruptcy code.  No attorney-client relationship with the firm of Halcomb Singler, LLP, is created through this blog. Also, please note that Erika Singler is an attorney licensed in Indiana and does not seek to practice law in any jurisdiction in which they are not properly authorized to do so.  The information contained in this blog is general in nature and should not be relied upon for the circumstances of any individual(s) or businesses.